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My wife bought a pretty shy kitten, but after a while it got used to me and was even jumping on my shoulders in the morning purring when I was getting ready for work. She almost wouldn't leave my side.

A week ago I was messing with the cat and she must've been in a bad mood, because she bit my finger while I was holding her (she's never minded me holding her previously). Instinctively, I went to shake off whatever was biting me; this caused her to be thrown straight down. She just froze on the floor instantly. I went and picked her up, cuddling her and trying to make her comfortable (she's uninjured, by the way), but now every time she sees me she sprints away and goes to hide.

She barely takes treats from me and when she does goes back to sprinting away. The odd time I manage to stroke her, she starts purring but at the same time trembles with fear. I need to know how I can improve my relationship with her or get her to be more comfortable with me again.

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  1. Patience.
  2. Gifts / treats.

Try to free some time so spend with the cat. Just sit / lay somewhere, with the cat around. It is important that she understands you do not have intentions to hurt her. Talking to her would help. Having handy some of her favorite treats will definitely help. Keep the treats in your hand, let the cat build the courage to come and eat them. When she comes at the beginning, do not caress her. Let her do the courting. You just follow.


I know an older lady, with an old female cat. Nice cat, but strong personality. The rule was: no touching. But I have a rule also: if cat, then touch. I take it as a personal pride to be able to caress a cat at least a little.

I did exactly what I wrote. A lot of patience, and letting the cat do the courting. The pinnacle of our "relationship" was the cat turning belly-up for more caressing. The owner was literally shocked.

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