How do I regain my cat's trust after forcefully pulling him out from under the bed?

Question

It's Sunday night at 00:15 AM. I'm exhausted from a long day and just want to sleep. My cat, who is going to be a year old in a few weeks, usually sleeps in my room on my bed and I usually pick him up and bring him up with me from downstairs, which he doesn't mind.

I have two cats at home but am closer to the one I just mentioned. The other cat is much older and isn't as playful or friendly. He doesn't sleep in my room--he usually sleeps downstairs, but today I came home to find him on my bed sleeping, and he was sleeping on the floor of my room when I bought the soon to be 1 year old cat up.

They don't really get along, but more so put up with each other and so maybe sensing the older cat, my 1 year old cat didn't want to sleep on the bed and retreated to hiding away under the bed.

I wouldn't have minded, but I knew he would move around under the bed at night and make a racket which would annoy me because, as I mentioned, I'm already exhausted. I tried to "lure" him out but he wasn't budging which annoyed me further and so I went under the bed and sort of pulled him out, at which point he scratched me and growled and then ran out of my room.

I went downstairs to cuddle and give him food by way of apology, but every time I tried to stroke him or pet him he would run away. I feel so guilty and this is especially hurtful because we were so close. I feel like he is now scared of me and will never forgive me.

What do I do?

Answer 1

Leave him be for a little while. He needs to know that you respect his space. He will come back to you when he's ready, just don't push him since that will slow down the process.

Much like humans friends after a falling out, trust needs to be re-established. You can do this just by maintaining his routine and respecting his boundaries. There is no established timeline for this since it's different for everyone, but he will forgive you eventually.