Families always have their arguments, and for some reason whenever I'M having an argument (disagreement causing to loud voices) with any of my family members my cat suddenly appears and gets a little fussy, movative, and has a curious face. She starts sniffing me, and if I continue, she may bite softly ( in fact too soft for a bite). Of course I realized she's stressed out, and for her sake, I always shut up and stop arguing and pet her. This also happens when I'm scolding my little siblings.

Now the problem here is that our house is kind of a noisy place (not to the point the cat shouldn't live with us, though). Kids at the age of 10 and 5 may scream at each other angrily and chase each other aggressively. Even adults may argue, but my cat never responds to any of them. However, whenever I come to settle things and start scolding the kids or even getting myself into some little quarrel with any of them or the adults, my cat displays the behaviour expressed before, even if she was in the furthest room away from me.

Now I have but two questions on this matter:

  1. Why is my cat displaying this behaviour (I'm not screaming or even looking at her at the time by the way, so I guess she shouldn't see it as aggression even though I'd be mad at the moment)?

  2. Why doesn't my cat display this behaviour to anyone else in the family (though they all get their disagreements and quarrels, and she's been with them since birth, although I was the one to take care of her since then because she was an orphan)?

I believe this same cat attitude was described in another question on this site, but the question was about snorting and not screaming or scolding.

Her ears aren't to the back. She looks even happy when she jumps all around although I know she isn't. Suddenly she's all nice and sweet and just wants to sniff me, but if I continue she'll bite. She does not do this to any other family member, although they are her family and she likes them as family just like me, not some sort of strangers. She's usually afraid of strangers and doesn't come out until some time has passed and she's used to the stranger. She herself scolds the kids when they keep rubbing her stomach or carry her in some annoying way (she makes noises, no hissing though, and pretends to bite to scare off her annoying siblings (human ones.) However, it doesn't always work, since they think she's just being cute) and she wouldn't dare do that to a stranger. She may hiss at them, though, and treat them as threats if they do something crazy, but never does that to her family.

What I'm trying to point out is that I believe she loves her family and doesn't just ignore them because she isn't used to them or something. She ignores their arguments and almost never let me have one.


4 Answers 4


1- Why is my cat displaying this behaviour (I'm not screaming or even looking at her at the time btw, so I guess she shouldn't see it as aggression even though I'd be mad at the moment) ?

Cats are able to understand that another creature needs something. This includes: keeping (feline, human or other) babies warm, comforting a crying family member, approaching someone who is behaving unusually.

When my girlfriend has some alone time (e.g. after a fight, or when she's sad from a movie), the cats seems to seek her out. They are not cuddly cats (they're a bit apprehensive of close contact), but they are notably more cuddly when she's sad.

Similarly, a cat I had when growing up never really sought attention, but still visited me when I was upset.

2- Why doesn't my cat display this behaviour to anyone else in the family (though they all get their disagreements and quarrels, and she's been with them sense birth although I was the one to take care of her sense then because she was an orphan)

Cats can have favorites. We notice it with our cats. They are sisters, but one is clearly extroverted and the other is introverted. Correspondingly, the extroverted has attached itself to my girlfriend (also an extrovert), and the introverted one has attached itself to me (also an introvert).

Your cat has attached itself to you and will therefore be more inclined to seek you out over anyone else. This can include responding to your behavior but not necessarily that of others.

You mention that the environment is usually loud. If you are a relatively quiet person in the household who then suddenly starts speaking (as the mediator, it seems likely that you don't get involved until that point), that means that your involvement is unusual, a rare occurrence. This can be an extra incentive for the cat to seek you out, because you're behaving differently than you normally do.

To subtitle your cat:

Hey there, buddy, everything okay? You seem to be out of sorts, is anything wrong?


It's quite obvious that your cat has bonded with you more than it has with the rest of the household. Our cat is the same, he concentrates 95% of his attention to me and 5% to my wife and children.

Cats are amazing animals, they can sense when you're feeling blue, angry or any range of emotion.

Our cat reacts a bit differently. When there's an argument in the house that doesn't involve me, he just chills. When he hears me raise my voice, he will try to climb on top of my shoulders and lick me or even mew repeatedly at the person I've raised my voice to.

Your cat just wants to get your attention and makes you stop yelling. Cats, as most animals, learn by trying. She has seen that sniffing or biting you will stop the yelling and she does just that. Biting in this context is meant well by the cat, a way to get your attention and show some comfort.

Make sure your siblings treat her well. Try to make them learn that a cat is not a toy.


Cats have preferences just like people. They can bond over several things. Mine, for instance, instantly bonded with me when we brought her home from the shelter because I was the one that came home during lunch to check on her and fed her early on. When my girlfriend and I had a massive fight and she was moving out, "Gypsy" actually went into the bedroom while she was packing and yelling... and peed in her purse! It was the only time she had ever acted out like that and she hasn't acted out since. In my eyes, Gypsy was saying "If you are going to hurt him, here is how I can hurt you." Touching gesture, right?

If I bring a woman over, Gypsy will quickly come smell her and size her up and if the woman fails that test, she will wedge herself between us. She may be smarter than me...


If your cat is only doing that to you - I have a potential answer.

I have a cat who does the same thing, but he can't meow. But I think if you're taking more care of the cat, more than any other family member, the answer is that she is more bonded with you that anyone else.

She trusts you and treats as if you were her baby, the answer therefore is that your cat is more bonded with you.

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