I have a 1 year old female cat who as a kitten up until now used to play with me as if I am another cat, she runs, and I'll have to follow her, then it's her turn to chase. I do that because she's been my only cat and we couldn't bring her another cat to play with until now. The point is she is only used to playing with people as animals but not real animals. When she was younger we brought her two kittens to play with. She used to chase them and run away from them as play but whenever they tried to touch her she hisses. We unfortunately had to give the two kittens to a friend for a particular reason. So since that time she didn't have an animal friend to spend time with. I felt she wasn't having her share of play, so I decided to get another cat for her to play with.

It is a 7 month old male. I thought it was OK if he is younger since his body size is bigger than her. Now she tolerates him since they both know she's the boss. But whenever he tries to PLAY with her she hits him, and runs after him, sometimes hissing, sometimes she backs off and leaves him alone. And sometimes I hear him screaming and she's attacking him so I get my water spray and shoot her and that's when the fight is over.

I'd like to say that there is no rolling around. She is just hitting him with her paw and he starts screaming and that's when I think he's just doing that so I would come stop her. They both love playing with us. But they almost never play together.

I'd like to restate that both cats are tolerant to each other's presence but they don't play together. So how do I make them play together?

But as I mentioned maybe in an unclear way that Joury had previous experience with cats (the two kittens i mentioned above). But the two kittens were not cowards so I think that's why she played with them. Silver tries to play with Joury a lot. But he always runs when she is about to do something, or when he gets too close, she either hits him or gives him a glare. I could notice that she sometimes wants to kinda play with him but whenever she shows him she's about to move he runs from fear. It's like they both want to play together sometimes but she always gets some kind of ego in the last second and doesn't accept him or he feels afraid for no reason so she hits him. What do you suggest I do?


2 Answers 2


There are some things to consider when having a multi-cat household, especially if she's never grown up with other cats.

1) Make sure they each have their separate food and water dishes, place water away from food and keep both cats feeding areas separate from each other - cats are known as solitary animals unless resources are abundant.

2) Each cat should have a "safe place" where they can escape from everything. You can use cat carriers (have one for each cat), cat trees, window-ledges etc.

3) Multiple litter boxes are a must. 1 litter box X # of cats + 1 = # of boxes you should have. These litter boxes should be away from their food/water and be on multiple floors (if applicable).

4) Feliway - this pheromone is a god send and will help with aggression/anxiety in multi-cat households. Get a diffuser and Plug it in the room they spend the most time in. They have recently released their feliway friends model to help with your exact situation.

Now that I'm browsing more through the feliway site they have a bunch of neat things to help you out "Interactive - Creating a cat friendly home"

5) Scratching posts - always good to have a few scratching posts for each cat. Cats scratch to mark territory and keep their nails healthy. You can entice them to play with scratching posts by spraying cat nip on them (Note: not all cats care for catnip). Get a tall post so they can fully stretch.

6) Royal Canin Feline Calm diet this food is designed to reduce stress in cats, there's no medication involved - what they do is they use milk protein and tryptophan (amino acid) to help reduce stress. The milk protein I believe is similar to mothers milk - which helps calm her kittens and the tryptophan is what you can find in turkey that makes you sleepy after you eat it!

Keep in mind Silver may NEVER want to play with Joury (love the name) so using these tips to aid in keeping the peace may be your best bet.

You can also check out the answers from the question Cat Toys for Energetic Cats to help with entertaining themselves.


Being that both cats are not neutered, the need for more space between them is greater than if they were. I agree with all of the suggestions made by @RebeccaRVT, but keep in mind they might not do much good if AT LEAST one cat, if not both aren't neutered. The hormones and instinct running through their bodies increases unpleasant behaviors such as scratching, biting, small spats, marking, etc. The frustration isn't just hard on you, it's hard on your kitties. They have no proper outlet for their instinct and hormones at this time. They are both males which means they're either on the offense or defense of their "territory" being invaded by a threat (another in tact male cat).

They may not be that violent, but your cat is sending off warnings to the other. "This is my space, my human, my part of the room, my personal bubble- back up".

Take a look at some of the suggestions to reduce stress in a small environment, from this post:

Keeping my cats in a room while I am at work

I know space isn't part of your concern BUT it is for your kitties. See if any of the tips help. Feliway is a good product, it has stress reducing pheromones and has a good success rate BUT will most likely not be strong enough to overpower what your cats are naturally producing.

If you can get one or both of them fixed, that'd be my number one recommendation, followed by @RebeccaRVT 's answer, plus some tips from the link provided. If you need help with the financial burdens of fixing them, reaching out to local cat rescues might help (some have low cost or free spay/neuter voucher programs).

You also mentioned that Joury has played with kittens "nicely" without issues in the past. Being that they were all kittens, and we're not yet producing any sex hormones yet, this may very well be the reason.

As an added bonus, fixing them will improve their overall health, increase their lifespan, and improve behavioral issues.

  • Thanks for your attention. Joury is a female and Silver is a male and i commented up that after going to the vet i new why things were going that way. Commented Jun 21, 2017 at 18:37

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service and acknowledge you have read our privacy policy.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.