Okay, this might sound weird but my 9 month old tomcat is going through a situation which I can only explain as depression.

So he had three siblings but their mother died immediately after giving birth to them. So we took care of four of the kittens. When they were around two months old my friend asked if she can adopt a kitten. So we requested her to adopt two so that only one won't feel alone. So now we had just two tomcats. Just two months back one of them died in an accident. We don't know who was the person responsible for this. So now we have just one tomcat and just a week ago he brought home a female cat. We tried feeding her but she won't stay at our place and that's reasonable too. But since last week our tomcat stays out for longer time, also he won't eat and keeps whining and crying. I thought he will get well in a day or two but it's been a week now. What should I do? I can really use your advice.

  • 4
    Are your cats vaccinated, treated for intestinal worms/fleas, neutered or have been tested for FIV/FeLV? Commented Apr 25, 2017 at 13:33
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    cats can get depressed by losing a friend or caretaker but they can also get depressed if you get a new cat or dog. to make it easier for the old and the new cat feed them in different places so there is less competition. Commented Apr 27, 2017 at 8:21
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    Whenever you notice a behavior change, always take your cat to the vet. Not eating especially is a sign that it needs a vet visit.
    – Kai
    Commented Jun 11, 2018 at 12:57

3 Answers 3


Agreed with comment above - cats can get depressed but in my experience it usually results in them withdrawing and not responding to any stimuli rather than what you say is happening, which sounds more like he is in some sort of discomfort.

If he's bought a stray female home with him he may have caught fleas, or worms, or at the very worst, FIV (though this is unlikely). Have the vet check him for all three, or at least get him some worming tablets and flea treatment, and see if his behaviour changes.

  • Actually the cat he had brought home was a pet too. For some reasons I think his problems are more of a emotional rather than physical or medical. We haven't vaccinated him yet, so I will get him checked from the vet for all the possible infections. Commented Apr 26, 2017 at 5:30
  • I had him tested by the vet and it seems that he has no such infections. Also he seem to be calm now and is eating properly and has started playing with us as well. Commented May 3, 2017 at 5:01

Yes, cats can go through depression and the death of a companion (especially close one) can cause that.

My currently oldest cat, Pralinka (female cat) joined us when we already had our first cat (Shila, also female). Pralinka was 10 years younger than Shila and always treated Shila as a sort of a mentor. When Pralinka was 3, Shila passed away. Last week of her life she spent under a drip (at home), under close care from Pralinka. You could see their bond then.

After Shila died, Pralinka went totally blue. She was hiding and avoiding playing, and she barely ate. She didn't want to be stroked too much and didn't come to sleep with us as she used to do. We were so anxious that we decided to try and take in another cat to give her some distraction. We actually took in two cats but it didn't change Pralinka's behaviour a bit.

Then, exactly one year after Shila's death, Pralinka came to us and started requesting her normal stroking. Everything went back to normal. Believe it or not, she just had to go through her grief.

But what you describe seems more like cats' behaviour while mating. At the age of 9 months a male is already sexually fully developed so he'll look for a female cat in a heat. He will stay out longer, cry and whine, might have reduced appetite. That's all normal behaviour, yet it might be a good idea to consider neutering your cat. You'll avoid this kind of problem in the future (not to mention excessive amount of unwanted kittens as well as your cat coming back with visible signs of cat fights).


I assume your cat isn't neutered, right? The crying is probably to call females he wants to mate with. The female he brought home left for some reason and now he wants to mate with another. Not eating and staying outside is extremely normal. But that's if he still eats a little bit. That would be a real problem only in case he never eats. So the vet says he's OK? Great, but when he does that again you should know now what's his problem.

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    And about depression yes cats can get depressed Commented Jun 20, 2017 at 4:32

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